waiting

the waiting game.

there are sometimes when waiting is fun. but right now I cannot think of them. because there are those other times when waiting is downright slow and long.

I was waiting at the train station for my dear friend Annie to get into town for the weekend. And as I sat there, then stood there, and even paced a little bit I waited. with so much anticipation. I could hardly contain myself. I was thinking of all the things I had to catch her up on, all the funny stories from the past week, all the interesting things from teaching. And of course I wanted to hear about her week. I was thinking of what the weekend would bring. and where Peggy and I would show here in Sarospatak. The fun little noise that signals when trains come went off. Which made me even more alert that Annie's train was all the more closer. I walked a little closer to the tracks. I was feeling so many things at this point. Excitement. Readiness. Anticipation.

And then it hit me.

What if I waited like this for Christ's return? What if I waited for my Lord and Savior with as much anticipation as I did for my friend's visit for the weekend. Having Annie here for the weekend was so much fun, but it ended after two days. But the joy and celebration Christ's arrival will bring so much more than a weekend of fun - at for eternity. wow.

So this is my challenge for myself. And maybe you can claim it as your own as well. That I would live my life. my day to day life. FOR HIM. as in waiting for His anticipated arrival. I believe that if I start to do this my life will slowly begin to change and look differently than I have ever lived before. So this waiting, this time, it is good. because between now and when Christ comes again it is not that of a long and slow waiting period, but a waiting period filled with hope and excitement.

walking

two posts in one day...don't get used to this. :) it is only because i wrote "change" last night and since we still have to go to the cafe for internet i am now getting a chance to post. so without further adieu, enjoy.

Since I live in a small town here in Hungary I have to walk everywhere. But I don’t see it as a burden. I see it more as a privilege, a special thing. Something I get to do. And I truly am thankful for it. I think walking gives you a different perspective on things. On the town. On the people. On life. I have traveled and studied abroad before and the times and places I have felt so much closer to the country, the culture, and the people have been when I have had to walk. And so I am thankful. I am thankful that I get to walk everywhere here in Sarospatak. I am thankful I don’t have a car and that I cannot drive this entire year (as strange as it is). Because I am finding that this way of more simply living is better. It is better on so many levels. It allows me a chance to look around and explore to places I never would. It allows me to see people along the way. It allows me to smell our neighbor’s roses and enjoy their garden. It allows me to see things I would never have had the chance to otherwise. It allows me to enjoy the day more. But most importantly, it allows me time to think and pray. And for that, especially, I am so grateful.
When I think about how much walking I have done since I’ve been here I can’t help but think about Jesus and his disciples and how they walked. They walked everywhere. And they didn’t even have a choice. And I love to think how this was a part of their ministry. Such a simple thing and God used it. Now that, that encourages me. I don’t know if God will be able to use me walking this year as ministry, but I certainly hope and pray that he will be able to use me, even if it’s through something small like walking, to bring glory to His name.

This is my prayer. Could you make it yours too?

God, you have opened my eyes to see the world around me here in Sarospatak, Hungary in a new way when I walk, and I am so grateful for this. I pray that you will continue to do this, but not just with me. for whoever is reading this. Lord, you work in incredible ways. And so I pray that you open our eyes to the ways in which we can bring You glory today, tomorrow, this week – even in the smallest ways.

change.

I was blessed to have a dear friend send me a much anticipated book that just came out by one of my favorite authors. It is called "Bittersweet" by Shauna Niequist. (If you have never heard of her please go look her up right now! She is so talented and her words hit you right to the soul.) The topic of this book could not be anymore perfect for what I am going through right now, "change, grace, and learning the hard way". And so here are a few thoughts of hers on change. and then you will find a few thoughts of mine on change after. enjoy.

"I know better than to believe that the changes are over, and I know better than to believe the next ones will be easier, but I've learned the hard way that change is God's greatest gifts and one of his most useful tools. I've learned the hard way that change can push us, pull us, rebuke and remake us. It can show us who we've become, in the worst ways, and also in the best ways. I've learned that it's not something to run away from, as though we could, and I've learned that in many cases, change is not a function of life's cruelty but instead a function of God's graciousness." - Shauna Niequist, "Bittersweet", page 20

"This is what I've come to believe about change: it's good, in the way that childbirth is good, and heartbreak is good, and failure is good. By that I mean that it's incredibly painful, exponentially more so if you fight it, and also that it has the potential to open you up, to open life up, to deliever you right into the palm of God's hand, which is where you wanted to be all along, except that you were too busy pushing and pulling your life into exactly what you thought it should be. So this is the work I'm doing now, and the work I invite you into: when life is sweet, say thank you and celebrate. And when life is bitter, say thank you and grow." - Shauna Niequist, "Bittersweet", page 13


Three weeks. I have been here for three weeks. In thinking about the time I have been here so far I realized that those first two weeks were the hardest because I was fighting the change that was taking place. As ready as I was to be here and to experience what God has called me to do here I was not ready at the same time. I was not ready to leave my family and friends. to leave what was familiar. to leave what was easy. But I have seen a change that has already to take place inside of me. inside of my head, my actions and words, and my heart. I am changing.
I went into this year asking the Lord to change me. to mold me and remake me to what He wants me to be. And I have already seen that transformation start to begin. slowly. but surely. And I'm not as scared as I once was. Because change gets easier with time. And it is. It is a day by day process. though, not an easy process.
But when is life easy when we are following what God has called us to do?
And I believe that is the beauty in change. God uses change to show us things. things we may not like, but things that are so good for us.

Heavenly Father,
Thank you for this year. For sending me to a place I knew very little about before coming. I like that. I like not knowing. And thank you for this change. I was scared. I was scared to do something hard and to jump. But why should I be when you have always been there for me before? You have given me your promises. And through these I have been so blessed. Continue to give me your love and strength and promises to hold onto when I am down about being in such a different place. Allow me to see this year as something so good. something from You. Amen.

you're the God of this town

I was listening to “God of this City” by Chris Tomlin this morning as I was getting ready for church I thought about how I haven’t really looked at Sarospatak in this way God wants me to. I have looked at these people no more than I would any other person, which I don’t think should be the case. And it took listening, I mean, really listening to this song to realize something so sound and so true. It was through this song that I realized God wants me to look at these people like he does. He loves these people. The people of Patak are HIS. His heart breaks for these people. He wants to be their hope. He wants to be known. He is here. And my prayer is that if I can be just a small part of what God longs for for these people then so be it. I pray that I can be who He wants me to be here. And I pray that even though I miss home. I will BE here. Wholly and devotedly here.
I know God has called me to be here this year for a reason. So I need to stop “wishing” it was next week or next month already because it does me no good to wish away the moments I have here. Because as soon as I know it it will be June 2011 and I will wonder where the time went. And I will miss it as soon as I am back in the States. (I know myself well enough that this will happen. : ) So this is my confession. I have not “lived the moment” since being here. I have not said “thank you God”, and if I have I haven’t meant it whole heartedly. I have not truly tried to get to know Patak, because I think I am afraid of what that will do to me. So this is my prayer. I pray that I may not look ahead to what will happen in the future, and if I do that I will be quickly reminded that what is happening “here and now” is more important. I pray that I may be more sincere in my thankfulness. And I pray that I may continually be more open to what God wants to teach me- through this town and its’ people. And I pray that God will break my heart for this town. Because I believe that’s where it all begins.

and so I leave you with this...

You’re the God of this City.
You’re the King of this people.
You’re the Lord of this nation.
You are.

You are the light in this darkness.
You are the hope to the hopeless.
You are the peace to the restless.
You are.

There is no one like our God.

For greater things have yet to come.
Greater things are still to be done in this city.

things i am thankful for lately...

things i am thankful for lately.

- a couple from school who is willing to help Peggy and me learn Hungarian.
- a beautiful sunset.
- wise words.
- the lack of internet in our flat which has led me to spend more time to journal and with God and has allowed me more sleep the past few nights.
- eager students.
- packages filled with goodness.
- change.
- answered prayer.
- challenges. big and small.
- time. as slow as it moves sometimes.
- a thoughtful and loving boyfriend.
- a gracious and faithful Father.
- support felt, even from afar.

that is it for now. but it is surely a list i know i will be adding to regularly.

so encouraging.

note: this post was written for yesterday, Tuesday, August 31, but our internet was out and it is only till now that I am able to get internet at a local cafe (because it is still not working in our flat). just wanted to let you know! : )

Today was good. very good.

After coming back from Miskolc this weekend it was good to be back in Patak. Peggy and I said it was good to be home again. (Isn’t that funny how a place can become home so quickly?) The thing is though Patak was still not completely home (and never will be, of course. Don’t worry Mom and Dad ☺ ) …until today.

This afternoon we had our school’s opening ceremony for the year. It was fun to get dressed up and be surrounded by all the students, teachers, and faculty. This ceremony made being here, and teaching, much more real to me. It was like “okay, I am actually doing this.” We found one of our fellow English teachers and sat down until he found two students we should meet because they not only were going to be our students, but they have also lived in Toronto. They were very sweet, and our colleague said we would have to meet his parents because they would be great people to talk with. We then met the director of our school and a Greek Catholic Priest and they were very talkative, which was nice. They were very interested in our lives and thoughtful in the fact of offering to help with anything if needed with our flat.
After the ceremony I ran into Gabor, the boy I talked about a few posts ago. It was almost strange to have someone I recognized in Hungary, but it was great to see him. We talked for a bit and then end walked with us back to our flat. While we were standing outside a car drove by and stopped. I just figured it was because they lived across the street, but instead it was the mother, Ana, of the two students we had met earlier (right before the ceremony). She told us a little about herself and her family and encouraged us in being here. She said that when her husband returns from Ukraine she would love to have Peggy and me over. It is hard to explain, but I was so touched in meeting Ana. It was something God knew I needed. I have been praying and hoping for someone like her and her family. (She has two boys who will be starting High School and a daughter in 5th grade.) I am a very community driven person. I need it and long for it. And I know that God blesses me through it and blesses others through it because of me. So I just felt that in meeting Ana this could be something that will be such a blessing for me this year. So I ask that you will pray for this situation and that God will bless it. I pray that meeting Ana and her sons, Aaron and Daniel, today was just the start of something really great. And I pray that this is only the beginning of community and good relationships here in Sarospatak.

I will leave you with a few of the verses I have been mediating on in preparation for Hungary and now that I am here.

“So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.” Isaiah 41:10

“The Lord your God is with you, he is mighty to save. He will take great delight in you, he will quiet you with his love, he will rejoice over you with singing.” Zephaniah 3:17

This verse was read in a women’s Bible study and it really spoke to me. I will certainly face hard times this year (let’s be honest, I already have) and so my prayer and hope is that it is through the challenges and difficulties I face that I will become stronger through Him, and that my reliance on His grace will become deeper.
“ ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.’ Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.” 2 Corinthians 12:9-10


And for the verse that I am claiming as this years’ verse:
“But as for you, be strong and do not give up, for your work will be rewarded.” 2 Chronicles 15:7
This verse is so encouraging to me as I know that this year will be tough in so many different ways, but I know that God has put me here for a reason and it’s through him that my work will be rewarded, even though I may not see it this year.

So, again, thank you so much for your thoughts and prayers. They are truly appreciated. …just keep them coming. And I will try to be better about blogging to keep you updated on what is happening here. ☺